115: Building Real Resilience in Kids (Even When It’s Hard)

A few days ago, Kathy asked me to listen to a parenting podcast by Dr. Becky that stopped me in my tracks. In it, the host told a story about planning a movie night as a kid — driving to Blockbuster, hoping the film you wanted wasn’t already rented, and learning to deal with the disappointment when it was. 

That memory hit hard because it reminded me just how much patience was once built into daily life… and how little patience is required today.

When everything is on demand, our kids rarely get those “micro struggles” that used to build frustration tolerance and emotional resilience. And honestly, we adults aren’t much better. I catch myself losing patience with slow websites or late deliveries. We’ve been conditioned for instant gratification, and it’s changing how we react when life doesn’t move at that pace.

So in this episode, I share how we’re trying to reverse that trend at home. We’re saying “no” more often, creating intentional friction, and letting our kids wait, fail, and figure things out. They feed animals, wash their clothes, cook for themselves, and learn that boredom isn’t the enemy — it’s an opportunity to think, to try, to create.

Moving to the countryside will add more of that by necessity (we’re leaving the Atlanta suburbs to start a 40-acre homestead near the Alabama border). There won’t be same-day deliveries or quick runs to the store. It’ll mean planning, adapting, and sometimes going without. And I think that’s a good thing. Because resilience isn’t something kids are born with. It’s something they build through experience.

If you’re a parent, I hope this sparks reflection. Maybe it’s canceling a streaming service, setting delivery limits, or just letting your kids be bored. However you do it, add a little friction back into life. Because when everything is easy, growth disappears.

Learn more:

Dive deeper into the conversation that inspired this episode with the podcast by Dr. Becky: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/good-inside-with-dr-becky/id1561689671?i=1000731750042

Thank you to this episode’s sponsor, Peluva!

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In this episode:
00:00 Intro
00:31 Inspiration from Dr. Becky
00:59 The Blockbuster era: Lessons in patience
01:36 The impact of instant gratification
02:35 Adapting to a slower lifestyle
06:10 Practical steps to build resilience
09:45 Modeling patience as parents
10:27 Creating intentional friction
14:16 Final thoughts 

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[Medical Disclaimer]

The information shared on this video is for educational purposes only, is not a substitute for the advice of medical doctors or registered dietitians (which I am not) and should not be used to prevent, diagnose, or treat any condition. Consult with a physician before starting a fitness regimen, adding supplements to your diet, or making other changes that may affect your medications, treatment plan, or overall health.

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#Resilience #ModernParenting